Finding Your Romantic Side

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Why do Women Especially Need Romance?

More romance fiction is sold than any other type or genre of books.  Mainly women read them.  We didn't like any of the dictionary definitions of romance since they often used the word to describe it. Romance for our use is "the creative  and imaginative expression or demonstration of love and caring." 

Why do we like romance? It feels so darn good.  It puts you in a good mood.  It makes you feel cherished and cared for.  It's fun and can be funny.  It brings laughter and joy and is a great way to de-stress.  It makes you feel sexy.  Done right, it makes you want to make love with the person who is romancing you.  Get your man to the computer and show him this! The reason so many women are reading romance fiction may be because they aren't getting enough of it in their real life relationships.

Romance should be a no-brainer for men.  It makes getting sex so much easier than begging, demanding, trying for it, hinting and sniffing around for it, or promising to do something if you will just give him some. We know that many men just don't get it, because they often look for the easy way out.   This is it!

How to Romance

The best way to be successful at romance is to find out what turns on your loved one.  Everyone has his/her own "style of desires" and instead of trial and error, or assuming your sweetie wants what the media tells you, find out  for yourself, and at the same time create a greater intimacy between the two of you.  While loving someone includes meeting their needs, romance is about stoking and igniting the flames of desire.   Your job is to find out what your loved one desires and also let your desires be known.  Romancing is about pleasing the one you love. 

A woman often has to help her man find his romantic side as well as communicate what is romantic to her so he can return the "favors."  You can try asking him, but don't give up if you don't get much more than " I wished you would just get naked every day so we can do it."  Instead show him what is romantic to you and let him see the benefits he gets from his enthusiastic participation.  For that, you need to know for yourself what gets your heart rate up.  Here's a game:

1. Using our definition of romance - "The creative and imaginative expression or demonstration of love and caring."  Take a sheet of paper for each of you and at the top write, "Romantic things that I could do for (insert your sweetie's name)." Each one of you have 60 seconds to write down as many things that you could do for the other person that you think they would consider romantic. 
2. At the end of 60 seconds, switch papers and give your partner one point for every thing they wrote down that you would love to have them do for, to, or with you.  Whoever got the most points gets to choose one romantic thing from the list for the other person to do. 
3. Before returning the list, cross off the ones that you don't feel are romantic for you and instead add to the list, the things they could do that you consider romantic. Come up with as many things as you can and switch lists again.  Now both of you have a tailor made list of what you know is considered romantic by your partner. Remember, there are no right or wrong answers, it is your individual preferences, so please be accepting of each other's.
4. Celebrate in any creative, imaginative, and romantic way you both choose. 

Next Month - A Month's Worth of Free or Inexpensive Romantic Things to Do